Spiritual intimacy in a dating relationship

What kind of time should couples spend together in the early stages of a relationship?The answer turns on what you are trying to find out about this person at this stage of things.The first thing that should happen if it has not happened during the initiation of the relationship is that intentions should be established.Whatever that conversation looks like, intentions should be clear and it should be the man making them so.You're trying to find out whether this is someone you should know more intimately en route to figuring out whether this is a person you could marry. You are trying to figure out if you to know this person intimately. One suggestion I have for couples starting out is that the majority of your time together should be spent with other people, preferably with your families and church families.Get to know one another in groups, find out how the other person reacts to people, spend time with the people he or she cares about.Guys, don't wait until you've had lunch or dinner or "hung out" one-on-one four or five times before you let her know what's going on.The idea is to remove that period of confusion or vulnerability for the woman by being forthright about what level of intention or commitment exists (a la 1 Thessalonians 4).

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If you don't have even information at that level, feel free to tell him that you want some time to think and pray about it (that is, if you're not sure at that point that you're not interested).

If you know the man well or at least better than what I've just described, but you are not sure whether you are interested in him, I'd encourage you to at least take some time to get to know him before giving an unequivocal "no." Keep in mind that this is different from feigning interest when there isn't any.

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